…from the quill of Antishenes

All the lucky inhabitants of this lucky country had by now received a census form. The completion thereof and returning of same to the authorities is compulsory, just as about everything else in the lucky country. (For my non-Australian readers – The description “lucky country” comes from the title of Donald Horne’s 1964 book, where he explains that we Australians never ever had to bear a full brunt of our economic stupidity. The luck still holds, thanks God and Communist China.)

One wonders why does the Government bothers, as all information about the law-obeying people is already in their computers and the illegal visa over-stayers will not be filling the form anyway. Of course, it is all about the power. The rulers always wanted to know who, where and when; so as to tax and conscript better. Then they did not bother to lie that it is for our benefit, as the governments do today. Summerians did not pretend, and neither did the English. According to the “Anglo-Saxon Chronicle”, the census, then called the Doomsday Book, was conceived -“While spending the Christmas of 1085 in Gloucester, William had a deep speech with his counsellors and sent men all over England to each shire to find what or how much each landholder had in land and livestock, and what it was worth.” Was he planning more kindergartens?

Long time ago, BC (before computers) I wanted some information for a letter to a politician. I walked (walked!) to the offices of the Australian Bureau of Statistics in Adelaide Street. I was treated politely, however, when I said the information supplied is not comprehensive enough and possibly misleading, a higher scale public servant was called. He then explained to me that whilst the exact statistical information I was after does indeed exists, it can’t be released to the public. He hinted that the information would not be supportive of the government policy of the time. Publicly available statistics are just another propaganda tool, and only a fool or ABC can claim otherwise.

When the properly massaged results are selectively released to the public in due course, we can be sure to find that there is more Muslims then before, i.e. need for more madrasas and mosques. Also there would be more aborigines, despite our alleged horrible treatment of them and their third-world mortality rate. According to the Australian Broadcasting Commission they were not counted often enough at the last census.

Our brave (New World) public servants show their twisted sense of humour in Q.60 – Does each person in this household agree to his/her name and address and other information on this form being kept by the National Archives of Australia and then made publicly available after 99 years? Firstly, not many people would be around to sue the Australian Bureau of Statistics for the breach of that undertaking in 2110. Secondly, any person who lives in Australia and does not suffer from the self-inflicted politically correct blindness knows that the information will be on the Chinese Secret Service computers in 99 seconds after processing.

I would never advise anybody to commit an offence. Just treat the form as seriously as “your” government, led by “your” Bob Brown, cheered on by “your” ABC, treats you. (Oops, that might be an advice to commit a crime.)

About Antisthenes

A Greek philosopher, a pupil of Socrates. Led a revolt, with Diogenes, against the demands of the city-state and the sophistication of life. Accepted the interrelation of knowledge, virtue, and happiness; and sought the ideal condition for happiness in return to primitivism and self-sufficiency. Rejected all social distinctions as based on convention, scorned orthodox religion as a fabrication of lies, and studied early legends and animal life in order to arrive at a true understanding of natural law. The individual was free and self-sufficient when he was master of his passions, secure in his intelligence, impervious to social or religious demands, and satisfied with the poverty of a mendicant. Needless to say, a person who on the Fog of Chaos adopted the Athenian philosopher's name has nothing whatsoever in common with him.
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3 Responses to Census

  1. milan says:

    Census; exceptional article.

  2. rosencrantz says:

    I agree.

  3. Just treat the form as seriously as “your” government, led by “your” Bob Brown, cheered on by “your” ABC, treats you.


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