War for Jenkins Ear

…from the quill of Antisthenes


Sordid Speaker Saga is still making the news for reasons known only to the journalists. Did they really expect Gillard or Slipper to behave differently? But Mr Jenkins intrigued me with his throat-cutting gesture indicating what he plans to do to Julia. With both sides of the political divide praising him so lavishly I had to start thinking: if he is so honest what is he doing in politics and how did he get Labor pre-selected?

The answer is easy. Jenkins’ family has owned the electoral seat of Scullin since 1969 and the latest heir, Henry Alfred “Harry” Jenkins won a very satisfying 62% of votes at the last election. That would seem to indicate that in the northern Melbourne suburbs the family has significant personal following and that Mr Harry Jenkins could safely become an independent MP, as opposed to, e.g. Malcolm Turnbull. Promisingly, Mr Jenkins does not have the de riguer ALP background. B.P. (before politics) he was not a lawyer, trade union official or rock singer, just a Victorian public servant with a BSc.

So that’s why they are so nice to him now. Labor is afraid and LibNat are hoping and perhaps actively encouraging a delicately timed “independence day”. Will he lend them his ear? Well, there has never been any shortage of politicians ready to demonstrate by an example that politics is a dirty business.


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About Antisthenes

A Greek philosopher, a pupil of Socrates. Led a revolt, with Diogenes, against the demands of the city-state and the sophistication of life. Accepted the interrelation of knowledge, virtue, and happiness; and sought the ideal condition for happiness in return to primitivism and self-sufficiency. Rejected all social distinctions as based on convention, scorned orthodox religion as a fabrication of lies, and studied early legends and animal life in order to arrive at a true understanding of natural law. The individual was free and self-sufficient when he was master of his passions, secure in his intelligence, impervious to social or religious demands, and satisfied with the poverty of a mendicant. Needless to say, a person who on the Fog of Chaos adopted the Athenian philosopher's name has nothing whatsoever in common with him.
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One Response to War for Jenkins Ear

  1. Newbars says:

    It would have been funnier if this was set in a different country.

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